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Santa’s Reindeer Are Out Of Control

Shinesty sent this email to their subscribers on November 18, 2022.

Even Olive͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌   ͏ ‌  

Text-only version of this email

Shinesty (Image: Blitzened underwear) I am the pickle, teller of truths, oracle of the brine [CTA: “Play Some Reindeer Games”] (Image: Reindeer & sleigh flying through the air) (Design: some musical notes) You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen But do you recall… What they’d look like as alcohol [CTA: “Shop Xmas Undies Or Start Singing”] G e You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen But do you recall... What theyd look like as alcohol SHOP XMAS UNDIES OR START SINGING (Image: Reindeer from the print scattered around the lyrics) Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer And his buddies all are drunks Soon as they’re done with Christmas They drink until they all blow chunks All of the other reindeer Chant his name, they love him lots They always yell at Rudolph “Bro, you better buy us shots.” All of the other reindeer Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer And his buddies all are drunks Soon as theyre done with Christmas They drink until they all blow chunks Chant his name, they love him lots They always yell at Rudolph Bro, you better buy us shots. Then when last call rolls around Rudolph makes his move "Vixen, you sure keep it tight Are you DTF tonight?" Then all the reindeer black out And stumble home to sleep it off But Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer First pees in their water trough Merry Christmas, kids! (Image: Blitzened underwear) [CTA: “Get Blitzened”] Then when last call rolls around Rudolph makes his move Vixen, you sure keep it tight hJ Then all the reindeer black out And stumble home to sleep it off But Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer J? First pees in their water trough M MERRY CHRISTMAS, Are you DTF tonight? GET BLITZENED This weekes flasher deal, 30% off that 70s formalwear STAY WEIRD & RING IN THE HOLIDAYS Gif Instagram Facebook Twitter Tiktok Enter the Friend Zone We're at 2930 Umatilla St #400, Denver, CO 80211 If you're looking for PG ish content or you're someone's mom, follow us on Facebook. If you wanna get freaky and see what's not socially acceptable for a brand to say, follow our Instagram. If neither of those options appeals to you, follow us on Twitter. This extremely tasteful, hand crafted, organic, non-gmo, vegan, gluten free email was designed by Dain and written by Nate. You’re old enough to know the truth: Reindeer aren’t real. We hope you aren't down here to click this:
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